Hey everyone!
So, last night, my client Lacey had one of those moments where she was super embarrassed—because I’d given her some homework, and, well, she didn’t do it. Not exactly shocking, right? I mean, I coach people with ADHD, so missed homework isn’t all that surprising. But what really caught me off guard was the reason behind her embarrassment.
When I asked her what was supposed to trigger her into actually doing the reading, she told me she just figured the desire to read would magically appear sometime during the week.
You can imagine the face I made. I asked her, “Did you think that feeling was just going to materialize out of thin air?” And she looked at me, dead serious, and said, “Yeah, isn’t that how it works?”
Spoiler alert: That’s not how it works.
You’ve got to create triggers for your brain. Your brain is like a calculator, not a secretary. When you set up a trigger—like the alarm that reminds you to switch the laundry or the book you leave on the bathroom counter so you remember to read in the morning—your brain responds with thoughts, emotions, and actions. No trigger, no control.
Lacey, on the other hand, was treating her brain like a secretary. Picture this: “Hey Martha, tomorrow around 3-ish, remind me to do that reading thing. And, oh, bring me some of that new motivation juice. Thanks!”
Newsflash: Brains don’t work like that.
So, next time you get that sinking feeling because you promised to call the pediatric dentist three weeks ago and still haven’t—skip the shame, add a trigger. And while you’re at it, send this to that friend who still hasn’t returned your books!
Xoxo,
Jessica
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